The Art of Missing You

Time stands still when you're not around
Time stands still and I end up sitting here biting my lip until I taste blood
I can hear the clock tick even though it's digital
I'm standing on the ledge of sanity waiting, hoping, wondering when I'll see you again
Will anything ever be the same?

I can't remember the last time I slept
Even when I'm asleep I'm just so awake that I wake up more tired than I was before
I can't help but tell the truth to everyone I see
I'm going away for a little while because there's an angry mob chasing me
They want my soul
Apparently truth hurts

I guess this is called waiting
It's 4am and I'm sitting here fully aware you're asleep because everything is easy for you
You laugh
You smile
You live
Without me


I guess this is called being lonely
When no one will call me but I'm too afraid to call anyone
I'm to afraid to write
I feel so helpless and anything can hurt me
So I get angry
I'm pushing everyone away because truth is I'm frightened

I guess this is called insomnia
I can't sleep because every time I close my eyes I see you and to be honest I cry
So I just lie there staring at the ceiling wishing the phone would ring or I'd hear a pebble at my window
I lay awake hoping for some cliche to come around and put me to rest
I wonder if you're thinking about me and realize your not because your sound asleep
Time passes so quickly for you while I lie here counting agonizing seconds

I guess this is called confusion
I think you're what I want but maybe I'm just fooling myself
I tore down every picture from my wall
I threw away everything with any meaning
I don't want to remember what I had only what I have and none of this is me
No one is me
Who can be?


I think this ones depression
Lonely
Sleepless
Scared
Crying
I may not be a psychologist but maybe we've all lost our minds
Or maybe I'm normal and you all belong in an asylum
Maybe it's late again and I'm crying because everything is an excuse to talk to you
I'm yelling because I'm scared and I want to hear you love me
Someone has to
Can't it be you
I'm the only person who cares anymore
So I pushed away compassion and said fuck the world
Now I stay up all night fighting with my happiness
I guess I've leaped off the edge
Or maybe not I mean you are keeping me alive
But sometimes it's hard to sing and dance and smile

I like excuses

I enjoy avoiding the fact that I can't stop eating every sweet thing I see hoping i can find something that tastes like you're lips
Like Your sweet skin
Every where I go I smell you and call but you're no where

They help me hear your voice
If only you'd call because I know I'd sleep to your numbing love

I guess they're helping me avoid admitting that i miss you
well, the secrets out
i am helpless and i am weak
I need your lulling touch to breath
your breath on my neck when we hug
the only heaven I know when you smile my way

One more sleepless night as I fall apart
I guess I'm not as numb as I believed
I guess denial doesn't always work
but admitting doesn't make me any less alone